Winding down.

So, initiation is officially over, for the most part. We only have two more girls to initiate in Pi Phi-but for the most part, my job as Vice President Fraternity Development, is done. WOW! I had NO IDEA how much time, effort, and work this position would take. I am so happy I decided to slate. Becoming VPFD has probably been one of the highlights of my freshman year. I have learned SO much about Pi Phi. I have learned the heritage, the history, and the importance of everything we do. It has made me grow in so many ways. It has reached parts of my soul that I never thought would be touched-it made me apprechaite being a woman. It made me love-even more-the bonds of sisterhood. I wish I could explain in full detail what Pi Beta Phi has come to mean to me, but words could never express it.

It's just a RELIEF initiation is over!!!!

After the month of constant Pi Phi planning, I realize how much I have let my school work slip. I now realize that there are about 2 and a half weeks left of school. And I have a couple of things to worry about:

*20 page paper due in Econ by the 29th of April
*Econ test
*Anthropology Final
*Final acting performance
*Philosophy final

So, I guess I'm just here to write a quick post explaining my recent-and future-absence.

I have to say, life without blogging is no way to live! Everyday I wish I had more time to blog and write down my feelings, but at this point in my life, there is just NO WAY.

I just pray these next 2 and a half weeks fly by. I just hope I can stay focused and motivated on my school work

Wish me luck!

Pregnancy blogs

Realization.

I can't believe the semester is almost over. I can't believe that I am almost done with my freshmen year. It seems so surreal. I feel like yesterday I was in orientation wondering how in the world I was ever going to remember how to get to all my classes.

This semester has been one heck of a ride. I've learned, listened, laughed, cried, yelled, jumped for joy, had happy times and sad times. As I look back, it hits me how fast time flies. We really have to make the most of the time we have here on Earth.

To be honest, even 8th grade doesn't sound like it was too long ago.

This year has been an amazing one and once it's officially over, I do plan on writing a HUGE blog about it, so prepare yourselves.

But for now, I'm still in shock that it's almost over. In a way, I'm trying to hang on to the end of this semester in every way that I can. I don't want to grow up so fast. Thinking of turning 20 next year is probably one of the most depressing thoughts ever. It seems so old to me. I still can't accept that I'm 19! And to be honest, on my 18th birthday I shed some tears. I had a feeling that becoming an "adult" meant I had to leave my youth and child likeness behind. That thought haunted me. I wanted to be 17 forever and to this day, it still seems like the perfect age to me.

It's all passing me by too fast. I often wonder if I'm making the most of my teenage years. With the end of these years so close, it's hard not to look back on the good, the bad, and the ugly. But it does help that I can look back and say that I was truly happy. I experienced things that many people will never have to experience. But those experiences made me strong. They made me truly appreciate the happy times. They made me who I am today. And for that and that alone, it was all worth it.

Beta Formal

Dancing the night away with my Pi Phi sisters and hot bf....

A to the J.

"Me and AJ in our 'element'"

Family really is the best.

That's all I really have to say.

I can't think of ANYONE I'd rather hang out with then them. And I feel so darn lucky for that fact. even my extended family rocks.

I'm living with AJ this summer and I looking forward to it SO much. We have always been close. I lived with her last summer and she would come to CO during the summers when we were growing up. We've always just had a strong connection! She really is the greatest. I don't think a single person understands my humor the way she does. I don't think anyone can make me laugh as much as she does. And certainly no one has my trust like she does. I LOVE HER. And my most memorable times are with her. I'M SO EXCITED! There will be so many more memories made...ones that involve an obscene amount of laughter. YAY!

:)

It REALLY is the way I wanna live.

My entire life I have always been a busy girl. If I'm not doing anything, I just feel worthless, useless, and unneeded, which often leads me to feeling depressed and sad. Throughout high school, I joined every club that remotely interested me. I tried to stay as busy as possible. I was president of numerous clubs, played high school sports, and was a social butterfly. I was so busy, I came home every night at around 9pm because I had so many meetings, competitions, etc.

When I came to college, I really didn't know what to do. I had so much down time that I felt restless and unsure about my life (my first post).

I don't know why I feel the need to make my life busy and hectic....but it's just what I've ALWAYS known. I find comfort in having a crazy, hectic life.

And now that I'm busy as ever, something strange has happened. I finally feel like my life is exactly how I want it. i want it busy. I want to feel important. I want to have a "to do" list four pages long. I finally feel like my life is normal again, something I have been searching for since I started college.

And maybe I took it a little far, but hey, this is what I like...don't ask me why.

I finally have a job! One that I absolutely LOVE! I work at a gym about 25 hours a week. I'm taking 15 credits. I just got elected as Vice President Fraternity Development in my sorority and on the assembly for student government.

The truth is, I'm pretty stressed out about my life right now. Initiation for our spring pledge class is in two weeks-and I'm in charge of planning the entire thing. Luckily I have an AMAZING committee. But to be honest, being stressed just feels NORMAL and RIGHT. (yeah, I totally sound like a crazy person here) but it's true. I can't remember my life ever being calm and unstressful...except at the start of college.

It's just how I like my life to be. It's how I feel worthwhile and like I'm making a difference. Because in the end, that's all I ever look for. I look to make a difference in the lives of others. I look to make the lives of others just a little bit better. My peers. My sorority sisters. My family. My friends. They've done so much for me and I care so much about each of them-it's really the least I can do.

Plus, I enjoy it all. The planning, the problem solving, the creativity, the STRESS.